If You Are Sick of Lupus Posts, Just Walk On By Because This Is Another One!
Thanks to the incredible heat we had last week and the stress I have been under the past couple months, I am in a doozie of a flair-up. My symptoms are not nearly as bad as they could be and I thank God for that every day. When I read blogs of fellow Lupus…?…onians? I feel like I am acting like such a baby for complaining at all. But, all I have are my own experiences to compare things to and this week has been tough.
On a good note, this entry isn’t going to be full of complaints. Complaints like how my back hurts so bad that it feels like there are knives going in my shoulder blades. Or complaints like I think I pulled an eye muscle from trying to look around because it seems my neck has turned to stone. Or complaints about how more hair is in the tub when I wash my hair or how I have 3…no 5 new lesions on my neck, chest, and face that make me look like I am battling puberty all over again. Complaints like how I can’t really hit the brakes in my truck because my feet are in too much pain or how I can’t carry anything because while my neck was turning to stone, my arms and legs were turning into spaghetti. I also won’t complain about how my hip has been having this amazingly painful electric shock thing going on and I feel like I am being intermittently tasered. Or how my GI track feels like it is on a loopy roller coaster and I am seriously considering seeing if they make Pull-Ups in my size. I will only buy them if they have Looney Toons characters on them though. Because without them, they are just diapers for big people.
Nope! You won’t have to read about any of that!! You are welcome.
Instead, I am going to tell you about how I managed to become mobile yesterday despite the pain.
I remembered the day my doctor quoted Newton’s First Law of Motion to me.
My doctor told me that people with chronic pain get themselves in a vicious cycle of which I need to be very mindful.
Onset of pain leads to decreased movement which leads to increase in stiffening of the joints and even more decrease in movement which leads to even more pain and so on and so forth until we turn into a big pile of hurting concrete. Okay, the concrete was my imagination…he didn’t say that.
So yesterday, despite the pain I was in, despite the lack of strength in my body, despite the fact that my joints seemed fused together, I picked up some dumbbells. I did a few bench presses with a light weight. I did some stiff-legged dead lifts even though it felt like my elbows were going to pop. I did 50 squats without holding any weights and I did 12 minutes on the elliptical. The workout was NOTHING compared to what I can do on a good day and it seemed like a waste of time while I was doing it. When I was done, I was 100% exhausted.
BUT!!!!!!
My neck moved!!!!! For the rest of the day, I was able to turn my head from side to side without pain. Some discomfort but no pain! It was totally worth it!
I decided yesterday that I need to do this every day. I need to do SOMETHING every day to stay moving. Even if it is just 5 minutes on the elliptical and nothing more. No matter how tired I feel or how much I hurt, I need to keep moving.
And I need to accept that the goal of my workouts is no longer to loose weight and get ripped. My goal is to stay mobile and not turn to stone. That makes me sad but it is a reality and one I am willing to accept.
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On the bright side, with all your pooping you will be skinny and with the weight training and no body fat from all the shitting your pants, you will be ripped. Don’t you love it when i go all Mary Fucken Sunshine on your ass. I’m on the lookout for pull-ups with cartoon characters in your size. Will send when found. I love you, keep theLupus posts coming, you are educating the masses. It’s your purpose.
June 26, 2012 at 2:04 pm
See, Sandra, that is why I love you….you make pant-shitting sound cool!!!!! And I need a dose of Mary Fucken Sunshine from time to time!!! =)
June 27, 2012 at 6:47 am
Oh hon,
I am so so so far behind in blog reading and I am trying to play catch up. It hurts my heart ot hear that you are in such pain….and don’t for one second feel sorry for writing about it. We are hear to listen and support you. Heck, sometimes I wonder if I should be handing out free samples of prozac to every reader I have because I talk about bipolar so much
I have chronic back pain, arthritis, whatchamacallitis, but it compares nothing to the pain you are feeling. I completely empathize with you and know how hard it is to push through a single moment let alone an entire day. I am so proud that you did push through. You’re a fighter my friend. I hope that better days are ahead for you xoxo
June 26, 2012 at 6:04 pm
Thanks so much, Kim!!!! Free Prozac? I’m in! I know you understand what the pain feels like and my thoughts are with you too!!!!
June 27, 2012 at 6:51 am
No turning to stone!
Sorry for your pain.
Hopefully this will make you feel better!
An award for being a fab blogger!
Claim it here: http://www.sixfingeredmonkey.com/2012/06/it-took-award-to-make-me-realize-that-i.html
June 26, 2012 at 10:23 pm
Oooohhhhhh….thank you Six! I love awards!!
June 27, 2012 at 6:51 am
Just stumbled across your blog & cracked up! Your sense of humor and sarcasm are just what I needed on a pain-filled summer night
. I have lupus & fms and both are vicious bitches. I look forward to reading more of your posts. Hope your neck is still movin’ tomorrow!
Schooksike
July 19, 2012 at 1:25 am
Thanks, Schoolsike! I am glad you stumbled upon me…um..my blog. =) I am so sorry to hear about your illnesses and your pain. I hope you are able to find some relief from it soon even though we are face to face with the enemy (the sun) right now!!! Hope to see you around more! =) Thanks for the compliments!
July 19, 2012 at 7:11 am