Day 5 Of My 4 Week (Not Weight Loss) Challenge

I am patting myself on the back right now.

Since I began my 4 Week (Not Weight Loss) Challenge on Monday, I have not cheated more than one teaspoon of peanut butter and one lick of frosting (more on the frosting in a few minutes).

Day one was easy to follow because I was pumped.  Also because my diet has 6 small meals a day and since I only ate 2 large meals/day before this challenge, it seems like I was always eating!  I do eat often; every 2 hours.

Day two was not bad at all…nothing to report.

Day three?  I wanted to pig the fuck out and skip my cardio.  I was feeling the exhaustion and I wanted something buttery!!   But I reminded myself of my goals and it got easier!

Yesterday was day 4 and I totally nailed it.  Did everything right and reminded myself that Cheat Day is Saturday!  Woohoo!

Today is day 5.  I lost 3 pounds so far!  I am totally okay with sticking to my diet today because I know that I can eat whatever I want tomorrow.  This is good because we are going to my daughter’s college orientation and it will be hard to stick to the diet while I am out.

But a couple glitches were thrown my way and I am having an anxiety attack now.

My friend called and asked me if we were still on for tonight.  I have it in my calender that she and I are going to the movies.  I am fine with that.   I never want the popcorn.  Give me coffee and I am happy as a pig in shit.  She said, “Dinner and drinks.”  Which translates to Maria’s.

For those of you who do not live around these parts, Maria’s is unarguably the best damned Mexican Restaurant near me.  People have tried to argue with me about this and they lose every time.  If I have to drag your ass to Maria’s and shove the Holy Moly with the guacamole down your throat (I don’t care if you don’t like avocados…it is THAT good), force a beef burrito enchilada style down your throat while you are still trying to swallow the Holy Moly then funnel the pomarita down your gullet to prove to you that it is the best, then damnit, I will do just that.  And in the end, you will tell me just how fucking right I was.  Period.  End of discussion.  But beware…Maria’s has a “3 Margarita Limit” for a reason!!!!  They are oooohhhhh soooooo good and so damn strong.

I am trying to figure out how to do this.  Saying “no” to Maria’s is simply not an option.  For starters, did I mention that the food is really good there and the Margarita’s are even better?  Second, it is a tradition that Meg and I go to Maria’s.  We always go there when we go out.  One time the place was closed when we pulled up and we literally sat in the parking lot and stared at each other for 5 full minutes in silence with tears in our eyes.  Finally Meg broke the silence and said, “Now what the fuck are we going to do?”  It took us another 8 minutes to decide on another restaurant and we were miserable bitches to the poor waitress.

“Ma’am, I KNOW this is an Italian Restaurant but is it too much to ask for a Holy Moly with guac, a Pomarita and a beef burrito enchilada style?  This IS America, after all.  We are not REALLY in Italy!!”

Meg and I have recruited an uncountable number of people to this place.  It is like a fucking Maria’s cult and we are the leaders.  When we go there, the waitress doesn’t even ask us what we want.  She just brings us our orders.   If I go with someone other than Meg, the waitress gets all sorts of confused but she still nails my order every time.

So, this is one time when I MUST cheat.  I have decided that although I have stuck with my diet awesomely today and although I will be away from home tomorrow, my cheat day will be today instead of tomorrow for this week.  I can still make this work.

Shit!  Next week is Caitlin’s grad party.  On Sunday.  It is being catered.  That means my cheat day will have to be Sunday instead of Saturday.  That means that there will be 8 days in between cheat days instead of 6!!!!

I need a Xanax.

One last thing before I sign off here…

Yesterday, my daughter found a cookbook.

Thank you, Caitlin. This will go fantastically with my diet.

Today she made cupcakes for the staff at work.  Lemon cupcakes with a strawberry cream cheese frosting.  I told her to be sure she takes ALL the cupcakes to work.  She promised she would.  I wish my daughter wasn’t a big fat liar.

9 left on the toaster oven after she left for work.

I told her to make sure she cleaned out the bowl that she made the frosting in so that I wouldn’t want to lick it clean (I already had one lick).  She said she did.  She didn’t lie.  She did.  But in the fridge…

About half a gallon of the shit!!!!

I opened the lid to look at it.

Made with fresh strawberries and cream cheese!!!!! It is so pink and pretty!!!

I know…this is not her fault.  Nicki, accept responsibility and do not place blame!

I did not cheat.  I had none (aside from that one lick I just mentioned)!

And I know one graduate who won’t be having a graduation party for torturing her mother!

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